Points of view
by Amelie Elektra
Summary: Sometimes what you think is different from what is it for real... Yuffentine


-I'm pregnant.- 

Your words hit me like a heavy stone...  
This is so unexpected... So... Wonderful...  
We are going to have a baby... Together.

-Well, don't worry, I've decided to have an abortion.-

These, on the contrary, hurt me.  
This is their meaning: don't worry, you jerk, I've decided on my own to kill the result of our "love", even though you said to me "don't worry", when we fucked!

No, I can't think this about you...  
That's your choice...

I agree with you, you're too young, you're only sixteen, and you aren't ready for this.  
It's just...  
You asked me if we could make love, two months ago, isn't it? I told you about this risk...

Why did you change your mind so suddenly?

In two months we haven't talk much about this... Well, we had no time, with Sephiroth and Meteor menacing the Planet...

I'm so confused...

Why my body doesn't listen at me, when I order it to follow you? Why are you going away? Why don't you listen what I have to say to you?

I feel so empty...  
I'm such a fool...  
I thought that I could be happy with you, but all my memories, all the moments we had were only dreams... Only wonderful illusions...

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-I'm pregnant.-

I told you, at least.

You look confused.

You idiot...  
You really thought that this wouldn't have happened?

-Well, don't worry, I've decided to have an abortion.-  
I wish you were happy to know this...

Even if I really want to have this baby, I know that, for you, this is only the result of a miscalculation...  
I'm sixteen, after all, I'm just a Lolita with whom have fun... You never said me, but I know that you think so.

I was so happy, when the doctor told me...  
The only thing I thought about was to tell you we were going to be parents, but when I saw you, I changed my mind.

The best thing we can do is to stop it right now.

Your gaze is still passing through me.  
What's the sense in that?

Are you reproaching me?  
Are you relieved?  
Or what else?

Leviathan, I think I'm starting to cry... I can't. Not in front of you.

I turn my back to you. A tear rolls on my cheek.  
Stupid tear.

You'll never see it.  
You'll never know...

At least, you'll be happy.

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If I could have stopped you, that day, something will have change?  
Would you have listen to me, every time I tried to talk with you?  
Would you have shout and said that I'm an heartless monster, that I'm happy that our baby is going to die and you decided to have an abortion without even tell me?

I just want you to be happy... And I could do everything for your happiness.

I just don't know how to tell you this.

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Why did I tell you those things?

You are not a murderer! You are not a heartless monster!

It's just... I just want you to react... I just want you to stop me... I... I just want take the courage to speak...

I just want you to be happy... And I don't know how to tell you.

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I'm so fat...  
I think that everybody knows it, right now...  
I wonder what they are thinking...  
Maybe that I'm such a bitch... They certainly think that I fucked with somebody I didn't know... Because, for them, I'm just a brat. And brats don't fall in love. Especially with brooding vampires.

And… They think that these are my business.

What's the matter?  
Tomorrow everything is going to finish.

What a shame…  
I was getting used to the idea of have a baby in my stomach… That's just… So sweet… And wonderful…  
Why I'm doing this?  
Why I'm trying to convince myself that this is the solution of all my problems?  
What this is going to change, between us?  
You will always be a shy sixty-something man and I will always be a spoiled brat who is going to become paranoid...  
I'm such a jerk…

What was I doing with that knife?  
Ah, sure… I was cooking for dinner…

I stare on my reflection: there is a girl that I don't know… Even if that's me… The new me.  
My eyes are shadows of gray, sad, melancholic…  
They have no more that twinkling that hey had when I was the Materia Hunter Extraordinaire Yuffie or… When I was in love with you.  
I'm always in love with you, but… You see…  
In that period you were too… You were in love with me…

I was so surprised when you told me you loved me… I never thought that somebody so beautiful could actually love me… I was so happy…

Where is the man that I loved?  
How do we arrive at this point of no return?

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I couldn't help myself not to stare at you. You're simply beautiful, in your pregnancy.

Tomorrow everything is going to end, isn't it?  
Could I have some kind of explanation, one day or another? I think that I deserve it. I'm the father of our baby, after all.

I really wanted to face all this with you, I wish I could pin all the blame on me and be accused instead of you.  
But we wouldn't afford it, isn't it?  
It's all my fault...

I wish I could say it to you…  
This would be so simple…

I could smile at you, hug you and kiss you, clasping you slightly… Like I used to do months ago, secretly, hidden from the others.  
It was so beautiful…

Now your eyes are inexpressive, blank, like a snake's...  
Where are your stormy eyes?

Suddenly, I see you move the knife from your body and prepare yourself to blow.  
You... You can't do it!

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Can I? What would I miss?

Nothing at all.

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I stopped you.

I did it…

You aren't going to die.

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Are you… Crying?  
For me?

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-Silly girl! I wanted it! I want you to live! I love you!-  
I blush...

I manage to say it… All what I feel…

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You really want this baby?  
You want me to live?  
I don't understand…

Why do you love me?  
I insulted you, I said that you were such an idiot, thinking that I loved you… I told you I never loved you. That I was only fooling you… And lying.  
And you still love me?

I curl up to you, after month of longing for your heat and your touch.  
-I love you too.-


End file.
